The Love Potion 37 - 38

Atsushi -Bungo Stray Dogs

37 Ernest: Counterattack of the King:

In the early days, Ernest used to protest trying not to get angry.

Do your assignments yourselves.

Don’t push your food unto others.

Ernest fought back, but it was four against one – he really had little hope of winning.

As his frustration grew, Ernest thought and thought on how he could mitigate this problem. How could he make them repent?

He thought about it a long time, and asked his friends Sirius and Matthias for advice.

He decided to talk to his sisters’ tutors,

‘Could you raise the level of class difficulty to the same as mine? I believe my sisters are ready for the challenge. ‘

His sisters’ tutors had noticed that they had not been doing their assignments themselves. When they were informed that Ernest had been doing it, they were disappointed in their students, and so, were convinced.

They also had pride as tutors.

So he told the tutors; since his sisters claim that they have matured beyond the tasks given them, they will begin to receive classes with the appropriate level of difficulty. He was sure his sisters would repent the moment they had to deal with classes they did not understand.

The tutors agreed and decided that would be a good course of action.

For the time being, that matter was settled. He exhaled a sigh of relief, and then he went to the kitchen.

‘My sisters don’t like asparagus and paprika, green peppers, tomatoes and celery. Every day I end up having to eat it all. Can you put the hated vegetables in every dish for next supper?’

If all the dishes for supper were full of vegetables they didn’t like; they had two options eat it or go hungry.

He felt that this should solve the problem with his younger sisters; either eat dinner full of yucky vegetables or eat dinner with the veggies as small part of it.

But this was a double edged sword for Ernest; he also hated vegetables, but there was no alternative.

His plans were successful.

Tierra and Lucia found themselves studying things they did not understand. Lydia and Priscilla faced the reality of dinner consisting of dishes they did not like.

Ernest was elated, seeing his sisters’ distress. But his elation was short lived, for…

‘Teacher, I can’t do this. I have been asking Ernest…I just wanted Teacher to praise me. You’re being evil…’

‘Me too! I have been asking brother to do our assignments…’

Because the classes had become harder, Tierra and Lucia broke down and confessed before their tutors.

Lydia and Priscilla went to the chefs and cried, ‘We…we can’t eat it! Even if we tried our best, we can’t do it…’

Seeing the pitiful appearance of the young ladies, the tutors and chefs relented; they weren’t such bad children after all, they thought. Ernest was also foolishly convinced. (Zuben: This is all a bit silly, isn't it?)

From then on, seeing it worked, when ever Ernest retaliated, they cried in public to invite sympathy. He began to feel like a fool.

They were vicious, cunning and self-righteous.

He felt helpless.

If he retaliated before a lot of people out of frustration, he became an intolerant person, because they used their tears as weapons.

A woman’s tears were horrifically strong weapons. (Zuben: Ain’t that the god’s honest truth.)

The tutors knew this; every time they were given a difficult task, they cried false tears to get out of it.

The chef knew this; every time they were presented with vegetables they hated, the girls cried to get out of eating it.

They ended up being forgiven.

Even if they knew it wasn’t right, they ended up forgiving the girls and letting them go.

On the contrary, should Ernest denounce his sisters too strongly, he would be chastised. In the end, Sirius and Matthias who had been helping him were driven to resignation.

So Ernest came to realise; he was the bad one, and his sisters were good. No matter what had happened as long as they cried. (Zuben: Baby Ernest and Iris are the same. This really could have been mitigated with a "just popping to neighbouring country x for some training, see you tootsweet - not!" and bounce out for a few years but no, let's wallow in this 'misery')

In the eyes of people, those who shed tears are automatically protected. And Ernest became a cold-blooded narrow minded man.

His parents also disappointed Ernest. Both the King and Queen softly protected the girls, but they were strict with Ernest. It felt like horrible betrayal to him.

He could understand it thinking objectively. But he could not agree with it totally.

Their parents probably molly coddled the girls because they felt guilty. They felt guilty that Ernest had been nominated to inherit the throne of Berghausen. (Zuben: But it sounds like they were pampered from the start)

38 Ernest: The Crown:

Any royal child of Berghausen could inherit the throne regardless of gender. So everyone had expected Tierra as the first born child, to inherit. But-

‘Father! Why?!’

In Tierra’s sixteenth year, a year after her social debut, the heir to the Berghausen throne was decided by committee. (Zuben: they realised she was cray-cray)

They decided on Ernest, who was twelve at the time.

‘Why is it not me?! Why?’ She screeched. Her high pitched voice echoed in her father’s office. She had expected to be appointed; she had never envisioned a future where she wasn’t Queen. 

She rushed up to her father and asked, her voice high and shrieking in anger, ‘Who? Who were the fools who have a problem with me?’

A parliament committee of high ranking peers, including the King decided on the successor to the throne.

‘Which stupid peer decided that I was not fit for the throne? Was it Duke Foster? Duchess Schneider? Unlikely. Was it Fairfax?’

They were a few of the peers that were sitting on the committee.

‘Tell me, father!’

But her father solemnly shook his head before he replied, ‘Everyone.’

‘What?’

‘Ernest was decided unanimously.’ He replied coolly and calmly. Tierra blinked in shock for a moment, like she could not believe it.

Then, her face flushed with anger and she rushed at Ernest, who had been summoned as well.

‘How the hell did you plan this?’

‘I don’t understand what you-‘

‘You? Heir to the throne over me?! You must be mad!’ She screeched.

‘It is my right as the first born. I’ll be damned if I let someone as stupid as you inherit!’

She grabbed him by the collar, and shook him, heedless of her father trying to stop her.

‘The throne is mine! Give it back, you thief!’

With her anger, hatred and envy, she slapped Ernest, scratching his cheek as she went. The sound echoed in the office. And the scratches bled. (Zuben: Aiyo! Not very princess-like is it)

But Ernest remained stoical staring at her.

It could not be helped; the decision of the committee was absolute, no matter how much Tierra threw a tantrum.

Even the king could not overturn it.

Still, did she not understand why she wasn’t chosen?

Maybe she could not see it.

With the exception of Rosemary, who was still a baby, Tierra was the most intelligent amongst the girls. But she did not surpass Ernest. But Tierra was not refused the throne in terms of her intellect. Nor was it about her appearance; like Ernest, she had silver hair and golden eyes, a strong trait in the royal family. She was also the eldest, in truth, a few years ago the throne was certain.

But why hadn’t she been chosen now?

Simple: It was her character.

Tierra was arrogant and forceful, giving the vassals a deep sense of crisis. They did not want to have a ruler who lacked kindness and compassion for others; they feared she would become a tyrant.

They wanted to avoid that possibility.

And thus, they concluded that Ernest, who surpassed Tierra in intellect and character, (Zuben: She added ‘appearance’ as well, but what does that matter?), was the most suitable person to be the next king even though, he was only twelve years old.

Though as parents, they felt remorse and pity for their daughter, as King and Queen they had to think for the sake of their country. The decision was final.

They hadn’t waited for Rosemary to grow up before they appointed Ernest, and they were already thinking of marrying off Tierra and Lucia.

Realising that nothing could be done, Tierra began to oppress Ernest even more than before, from that day.

Like Tierra, the other sisters who had not been nominated also began to use their envy and anger against Ernest.

The harassment lasted a few years; until it was only Rosemary left. Rosemary grew up relatively obediently. (Zuben: I feel sorry for the various husbands and vassals)

Ernest realised something serious for the first time. He began to reject the very existence of women due to being oppressed by his vicious sisters. Ernest never experienced sexual desire.

It was a rather miserable situation as a man.

At balls, despite his responsibility to assure a line of succession, he could not bring himself to choose a woman. They were beautifully dressed, pressing their bosom against him in a bit for his attention, staring at him trying to be both alluring and demure,

‘What kind of woman do you like, my Prince?’

‘If you choose me, our house will surely be of help to you, your Highness.’

‘You know, I have been talking about you for a long time, your Highness…’ (Zuben: What the fuck have you been talking about?)

But he saw right through them.

One young lady liked to look down on others.

Another was pompous though she tried to hide it

Another lady looked graceful and magnanimous but in truth was a spiteful woman.  (Zuben: All these could be one woman)

In order to be Queen, the ladies simpered and clung to Ernest. It was all in vain. Because of the lessons he learned from his vicious sisters, he found it easy to deduce their true nature. (Zuben: Villainess radar)

In the end, balls became a nightmare for Ernest.

Every time, he went to one and the perfumed mob gathered he fought a rising nausea and his growing aversion to women.

Eventually, the senior vassals gave up on the idea of Ernest every marrying. Ernest himself realised that he may never react sexually to a woman, ever.

One evening, during the fall of his twenty eight year, Ernest was trying to fight the nausea that was growing from seeing his friend’s wife crying – in public.

‘Matthias…!’ she cried.

‘What’s happened, Letty?’

‘Oh, I just…Iris introduced me to her beau, Damian…but then, we were have a nice time chatting and…and Iris began to glare at me.’ she recounted between sobs

The Countess of Reinfeldt, Matthias’ wife, looked up at him with doe like eyes, like a little fragile animal. Large clear tears fell from her big green eyes.

The gentlemen around her were taken with the display.

They stared at her in adoration.

Ernest could not understand theirs or Matthias’ taste. What could he have been thinking when he fell for this kind of woman?

What did the Countess Reinfeldt think she was playing at? This was not their home; it was a royal ball. You should not be crying so unabashedly in public, at a royal ball, even if you were scorned, insulted or bitten by someone.

Did she not think about the reputation of the woman she was talking about?

‘Why is Iris doing such terrible things? I…I love Iris…’ (Zuben: Why are you doing terrible things to Iris?)

‘Yes, yes Letty.’

‘Why doesn’t she understand?’ she asked tearfully.

Oh, this woman Iris was Leticia’s sister; the second daughter of the Reinfeldt house: A supposedly awful woman.

 But Leticia was no better; she did not seem to be conscious of the power of her tears. She used the tears unconsciously showing her weakness in public. Ernest thought that her behaviour was worse than his sisters.

‘Matthias, I will leave you to it.’ He said. 
He had reached his limit.

He left the ballroom without waiting for Matthias’ reply, headed straight for his hidden room that was protected by a bookshelf in his personal library.

Once inside, he headed straight for the window and opened it to let air in. He stood in the darkness taking in the fresh air trying to clear the nausea and disgust that had built up. It had been rather intense; he hadn’t had an attack in a long while.

He took deep breaths to inhale the fresh air.

Soon he settled.

‘-I hate you, Leticia!’ A sorrowful cry cut through the cool autumn night to Ernest’s tympanic membrane.

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