Blade Man Episode 1 and 2 - Olfactory nice to me you

I decided to recap this. The show is at the half way mark now but hey...

   The story opens in the grounds of an art gallery. Actually its a house but it's an art gallery. The rain comes in and a 'mysterious' force is chopping shit up like a demonic cutlass, and killing poor gold fish just cos hulk smaaaash!!!

  The sun rises and the head steward who seems to think she's a lady in waiting in a saeguk and her hairstyle certainly seems to agree with me, haughtily tosses an apron at her subordinates as she climbs the stairs of the weird house complaining about how down-trodden and wretched her life is. Lady, your life seems mighty cushy from here on my Ottoman, and I don't think the people, who you threw an apron at without making sure it didn't end up in someone's eye, would agree about your wretchedness - when your uniform involves a large silk skirt and you kinda look like a modern update of the 1920s.

Anyway she suplicates unconvincingly at the door of the bedroom where the Man-At-Arms Secretary Ko/Go?so whatever stands guard. The mysterious prince don wanna eat his brekkie. She argues she aint gonna assume nuthin. After some to and fro, he lets her through. She entered timidly but the manner seems contrived and fake. We are treated to the shot of the prickly prince's nose, cos that is what this segment is about - man. She implores his to take advantage of their cooking skills, 'cos breakfast is a very important part of the day. He jumps up and questions her words of choice 'cos I'm sure his newly acquired superpowers olfactory superpower can smell the falsehood in her words. She chooses to self-reflect, and he chooses to tell her what she pooped and how she pooped it, what deodorant she's using, whether she uses talcum powder down there or not. You know stuff we should not be wasting story time on. It all ends with him not deciding which one of the breakfasts, they have made, he will eat. He tosses clothes at his Secretary Ok-Go, they no smell good. Even if I dun watch a lot of these korean dramas, I know this is some kind of subversive advertisement, I get mimosa but what the hell kinda smell is cotton fresh and warm or whatever it is he said. Sec. Ok-Go also uses make up or essence o.O? whazzat? Quick googling informs me that is it a part of the Korean skin care routine. According to prickly prince it smells like spit. which is a legitimate complaint. Whatever that shit is, Mr Ok-Go, it's working, 'cos you look like you are even younger than your boss?

Is this the face of a man irritated by the smells in his house?

On to our Kyung-hee Sue or Mae Ri Sue? I'll figure it out eventually. She's being harassed by her landlord. The busy body neighbours have been gossiping that she has a harem. Whilst she's trying her terrible acting skills on her landlord, the harem are hanging out on a ledge, but they can't escape because, their lady has locked their shoes in her cupboard, One of the numpty-harem team tried to get back in by jumping onto a polyester duvet on a linoleum floor, unsurprisingly he lands on his arse. Another contorts himself under the sink to hide from the landlord but they are caught anyway. He ends up in hospital with the numpty-harem crew and the princess.

There Prickly prince smells her cos you remember he's got super smell like Krypto the superdog. He thinks its someone else, but invades someone's privacy to check, the Numpty harem are bafflingly oblivious. The Head odalisque of the numpty-harem bursts past him like a ghost and does not even twig 'who's this weirdo bloke?'

Princess decided she going to confront Global Games CEO - the prickly prince, she is told no one knows what he looks like, hence the invisible man treatment he's getting. She's headed to him anyway, he has a game of theirs that one of the sleazy ex-eunuch of their developer harem sold to global games (sounds like he's the smart one). As she passes by, his nose gets the scent of all the fruits in the universe - all the flowers in time.

Dear sir, I have been down the fruits and vegetable isles in the supermarket, all it does is either smell like crap or intense sugar. As for roses, I shall let the great Outkast say this for me:

The fruit smells would make sense if it was even noted that he liked fruit but I think someone needs to inform the writer that this is not how the science of olfactory attraction works. The flowers nonsense only makes sense in Mills and Boon - barely.

He follows princess and high numpty to the bus-stop and uses his super hearing to listen in on their conversation. He realises she's coming to him and decides to be there to greet her.

Ok-Go snaps to attention but they run into another car, which turns out to be prickly prince's unexplainable father. The Prince is so not happy, as evidenced by the stupid glare on his face.

Jae Hee Sue gets wind that their swindling ex-friend is making a break for the States, personally I think he has a better chance in China but what do I know. She heads to the airport instead.

The Prickly Prince becomes a mentally ill person when his father is in the vicinity because trauma, what else. Despite all the intentional and unintentional hilarity, this is melo. He goes crazy and leaps over the car and jump kicks Mr Gossipy-Hapless. Ok-Go smells rain in the air. In an awesome display of strength, throws the prickly prince over his shoulder and runs off with him; because traffic. Hilarious!

Ok-Go takes him to a boxing club, that he has purchased for this very purpose. He gets thrown about, but not in a supermanly manner, by the prickly prince. Personally I think the actors were having too much fun in this scene. After getting punched bloody, Ok-Go diverts his attention, fruity girl is going to be at the office. the memory instantly turns him on, which should be awkward for Ok-Go as the dude is sitting astride him. But Ok-Go is the perfect knight at all times, even when the boss is sporting a stiffy whilst sitting on his chest.

Hae Hee Sue gets to the airport and finds her query the cheating Dun gum, he tried to excuse his swindler lifestyle, but the sister wails like a terrible banshee. He sees that she aint letting him off, I think, and decides to make a run for it. head numpty joins as well even though he was just eating ramen with the rest of the numpties a few minutes ago. Dum gum runs into a toilet, Princess is not ballsy enough to follow inside.

Prickly P gets to work to find that Princess All the Smells In the World (please read with Jeremy Clarkson voice) had not made good on her threat to visit him, he is outraged. So he calls the thieving dude, who's locked himself in the toilet with king numpty harrassing him from outside the stall door.

A kid walks in but can't get his zipper down, so head numpty tries to help him. In the meantime, the person who brought the kid is outside standing beside Princes ATSITW looking shifty. She sees some shifty types and makes a break for it, they see her and give chase, on thing leads to another and there are man hands almost on princess boobs. She screams so loudly, Prickly P hears it via his phone call to Gum dum. Because useless chastity is more important than one's life's work , head numpty runs out to beat the not so offender up because, this old man touched boobs that head-harem numpty wanted to touch so bad. They forget about Gum devious and head to the police, whilst Gum Devious gets away.

The police only really arrest the almost pervert because he's a wanted criminal. Then stoopid princess remembers her query, but is reminded that he's left on a jet plane. She despondently leaves the police station, when an airport custodian brings the zipper kid to the po-pos.

He's been abandoned. The police to to take him in hand but it triggers recent trauma, cos this is melo, when a fat white police officer did the same thing.  The whole situation was badly researched, the pilice officers three of them just run past the child, look in the house from the doorway like perverts and run back out again like mo.There's always something weird about white people in Asian programs, aside from the fact they can't act for shiz. Do they take them out of storage and wheel them about as they are needed? They are always looking dry and pasty; like no one knows, after all this time, how to do their make up and light them. It's not hard to light white people! And why are places abroad always shot in sunny-soft focus?

Anyway the kid is crying and Princess nicey nice has had enough so she comforts him for hours. Head numpty tries to be supportive.

Meanwhile, Prickly prince is looking at pictures of his former lover. He remembers his dad insulting her - 'How are you seducing him?' he asked, 'I wear white,' she should have replied. Cos I dunno who wears as much white as she does. The memory still angers him to this day 'cos frankly he was a wimp, he goes apeshit whilst looking like someone stuck a hot poker up his jacksie. Ok-go sees lightning whilst waiting for Princess to return. Let's he honest, this is episode one and I think Mr Ok-go is the real superman here, he's taken so much beating yet I doubt he's well paid. Prickly P is rattling glass like wha! And the titular blades show up, and cause a city wide power failure because convenient. Zombie walks about for a little bit them passes out.

Wicked Witch of the Gallery house is on the phone to Shifty Airport lady. The po-pos are at airport lady's apartment. She's tells WW about the airport kid. WW wonders if she should tell Prickly Prick.

He wakes up in his bed to find Ok-go staring at him, he thought he had been dreaming. Ok go informs him he's found princess' mansion.

He heads there even though it is the middle of the night, he meets her on the street as she returns home with some random person's child latched to her back - so nice. Prickly P just sniffs at her breath successfully creeping her out, and he doesn't even have an excuse for that.

He finally explains who  he is after all the weirdness. She explains why she wanted to see him, but he is too entranced by the scent of the breath to give a fuck. I don't understand why he has no common sense, his father seems strict enough. He gets the wrong idea about the kid. She ends the awkward conversation by slamming a window security grate on his head. he somehow gets a scar.

She texts head of the numpty harem about the occurence. They are out drinking, she warns them to be careful.

The next morning, Prickly prince Joo Hong Bing finds graffiti on his house, It's the work of the drunk Numpty Harem. They get thrown in jail like they deserve.

Now they need their Mommy to bail them out as usual.

The next Joo male to be enamoured is the kid, he doesn't want to go with childcare services, so he's decided to marry her. Awkward - just like his baby daddy. The shifty gardener shows Prickly Prince JHB, the mysteriously cut tree. The only one in the whole garden. Cut so cleanly, he tells us, and we are supposed to be mystified? Or what?

Child services come to get the kid. It's heartache all round. Boo.

She finally has her meeting with Prickly P but it's a bust. She advices him to have breakfast, and goes to take a shower, because it helps her think.

Meanwhile, Prickly Prince takes lunch, and behaves like a spoilt child. I wonder based on the father if he wasn't allowed to be wilful as a child, that's why he's behaving now as an adult. Either way, ok-go is too devoted. He gets a call to go the the police station.

They arrive just as Princess is taking her injured friend to the hospital cos his back had given out. He doesn't smell her this time. His half brother has been arrested by the Police - My! there is a lot of visits to the police station, there are only the first two episodes! Anyway the brother got in a fight because his so called friends do not believe Hong Bin is his elder brother. Hong Bin denies him. and leaves. Just as he exits the building, Father of the Century arrives without sparing a glance at Hong Bin, Prickly gets his rage-shakes. FOTC punches Junior as soon as he arrives with no by your leave. He continues slapping Junior, then Hong Bin comes to stop him. Prickly asks what Father wants of them. He wants them to follow his well laid path, to something. I'm thinking politics. But Hong Bin owns a games design company and acts like a spoilt child all day, and Hong Joo is not doing well in his studies. Hong Bin's knifes are coming to life. Ok go takes us to the window to see the rain unfurl. His thumb somehow produces a miniature knife to prick daddy with. Ok-go kicks him in the nuts. the knives vanish. Despite being in public, no one seems to notice.

Mae Ri Sue is with her friend in the hospital, He needs surgery on his back. I say anaesthetic and steriod injection into the offending area will help. Unless he's fractured it, who knows. Based on watching these drama's Korean medicine seems to be in the camp of 'As much money as possible'. Anyway, they are both broke arses, but she promises to be his angel/heroine. I roll my eyes. She heads to the canteen of an old family friend who owed her late father money, but they are ungrateful arseholes. She runs in the rain, To the Police station, again. She tells the Numpty Harem she cant help them, but she will get them a lawyer and they may go to jail but she'll visit. Someone decides to play crappy hopeful music. I dunno why.

Morning comes, we are back in the gym. WW Bulter Yoon called Ok-go to remind him about Shifty lady and the mysterious child. 'Tell him in an amusing manner,' she says. Prickly is dressed, and worries about the dreams he's been having. The last superpower to fade is his Kyrpto dog one.

He goes to visit his brother, that falls flat. Ok-go trys to tell him about the abandoned child, in what is the most amusing scene, to me anyway. But then He mentions 'Kim Tae Hee'. They head to the airport to see CCTV of shifty lady, now known as Eliza Park (fake name obvs) dragging the kid across the arrival terminal. I really like the musical sound of the airport policeman's regional Korean compared to the blocky modern Korean. Anyway the policeman tells him the details he placed so much importance to. He asks about Tae Hee, but she has vanished of the face of the earth. He and Tae Hee were lovers, but his father got her to vamoose, and Hong Bin has been looking for her ever since.

Chicky bird has gotten custody of the child whilst the Police search for his relatives and she's getting paid for it. Nice. They run out of gas for their pancakes, and merrily head out to the shops to get it. Whilst Mae Ri Sue is paying for the items, Chang sees the police coming, and decided the best course of action is to run away. Kids. Mae Ri Sue thinks he's gone back to the mole hole. She sees the Police and Prickly Prince there but no Chang, he is chagrined that she doesn't even acknowledge him. So they spend the evening looking for him. Prickly, true to form, behaves like an arse to Mae Ri Sue, the kid chooses that time to sing the 'Rain' nursery rhyme, badly. Kid, being six is no excuse to sing nursery rhymes badly.I know kids younger who can sing that better and English is not their first language.

Anyway, Hong Bin remembers Tae Hee Sue telling him she was going to name their kid, Chang, whilst Hong Bin dresses like a preppy rich boy, jumper included.

I dont quite believe it is melodrama, I feel that the intentional/unintentional hilarity is to lure me into a false sense of security, them boom I'n hooked on the idiocy, and invested on the outcomes. Is Tae Hee really dead? Will Hong Bin accept his son? What is this well lit path Father of the Century is on about? Will Secretary Go/Ko become superman?

Play us out homies...