Do Not Reconcile 41 - 42

 

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41 Love and Competition: 

She never bothered him, just sat in front of him reading her books.

At this time, the whole class was aware she liked Huo Mu. Even their class teacher talked to her about it, telling her not to be premature, she didn’t need to fall in love in high school. But Guanguan didn’t care, she wanted Huo Mu. She was even more unscrupulous, after all, their teacher didn't exactly tell her to stop.

Shu Lin attacked Guanguan – she was angry and disgusted with Guanguan,

‘Jin Guanguan, don’t you have any shame? You’ve chased him so much, but he’s told you he doesn’t like you. Why are you still pestering him? So many people are looking at you, aren’t you embarrassed?’

Guanguan looked at her in dumb surprise, ‘I pursue him, so it’s me who is shamed. What has it got to do with you? Why am I still pestering him? I like him, so naturally, I pursue. What you said makes no sense. Did I get in your way? Did I touch a hair on your head?’

Huo Mu was studying, he couldn’t concentrate with their chatter. He looked up at Guanguang coldly,

‘Be quiet. Read your comic.’

Guanguan perked up and picked up her comic book, ‘Yes.’

Just as she got back into the comic, someone called, ‘Jin Guanguan, someone is looking for you!’

Guanguan turned to see her mother’s friend’s son, Wen Jiu, at the door. Her expression brightened. They had been at a dinner with his mother when they realised they went to the same school. She immediately got up, and went to speak to him. He put his arm around her shoulders as they walked away.

The melon eating gallery were very lively; a good-looking boy came to find Guanguan. Was she eating from the bowl, but still thinking of the pot? Though she liked Huo Mu, she had this guy who was also handsome.

Shu Lin smiled haughtily at this and said to Huo Mu, ‘It looks like they’re very close. They seem to like each other. Even though she has a boyfriend, she’s chasing you. Does she intend on pedalling two boats? She’s a scumbag.’

Huo Mu felt upset hearing this, but didn’t understand why. He had wanted to calmly study, but that was out the window. He slammed his book closed, and said gruffly,

‘What does it have to do with me? She can be with whomever she wants; it is none of my concern.’

Shu Lin was happy about his reply. It sounded like he was angry with Guanguan, thinking that she was playing him.

After school, Shu Lin waylaid Guanguan while she was waiting for Huo Mu. He had been called by their teacher, so she waiting for him in their classroom.

‘Jin Guanguan, stop pestering Huo Mu. I dislike you prancing about him and chasing him. Let me tell you; we have booked in to sit the American SATs so we can go to Harvard together. He likes me and I like him. We have been secretly in love. If you continue to bother him, don’t blame me for being rude.’

Guanguan was stunned. She looked at her incredulously. She really couldn’t take her seriously.

‘Shu Lin, stop playing. Your joke isn’t funny. Huo Mu has already told me he didn’t have a girlfriend, and I don’t have a boyfriend, so I am free to go after him. You’re obviously lying, because you also like him; that’s why you’re using these vulgar tactics.’

Shu Lin scoffed, ‘I thought you merely didn’t have talent for study, I didn’t realise you were totally stupid. Why would he agree to sit with me with so many other students in the class? He was reluctant to sit with you. Now that we sit together, we are able to study well together. You can see the way he acts with me is different. You know very well he likes smart people and hates dumb people like you. He complains about how stupid you are all the time, how low your IQ is, how much he hates the sight of you. You’re not pursuing him; you are holding him back.’

‘We like each other, but because we aren’t allowed to date in high school, we’ve made a promise to each other; once we get into Harvard, we will be together. It’s only a little while longer. We don’t want to compromise our studies.’ (Zuben: Ai, this bitch is long winded)

‘Between you and I, he rejects you and avoid you. But he does not do that to me. I can be with him whenever I want. As his girlfriend, I want you to leave him alone.’

Guanguan couldn't listen to her anymore, but she couldn’t decide whether to fight her or not. Yeah, she was not studious – but her poor academics weren’t her fault.

She had talent!

Guanguan was upset, she left school without Huo Mu.

Huo Mu had been called by their class teacher as soon as school was done. He knew Guanguan, the silly girl, would wait for him as long as it took. So he had told the teacher he wasn’t feeling well, and his teacher let him go for the day. He raced back to class, but she brushed past him – ignoring him. He was perplexed; what happened?

Shu Lin was shocked by his return earlier than anticipated, but he didn’t react as though he had heard her conversation with Guanguan.

She rushed up to him and said, ‘Huo Mu, Guanguan asked me to tell you that she wouldn’t be waiting for you anymore. She’s going to the movies with that guy that came this afternoon. I mean the two of them look so ambiguous, maybe they are falling in love. Why else would she run away so fast?’

Huo Mu shrugged nonchalantly, but Shu Lin suddenly felt a heavy pressure in the air.

He believed her.

🌕

Guanguan was so upset, she cried all night. The next morning, her eyes were swollen like little walnuts. She was so upset by it all, why did she like such a scumbag? If he didn’t like her, he should’ve told her clearly. (Zuben: I might be missing something, but didn’t he tell her clearly?)

But when she thought about it, he did make it very clear and asked her to stop pestering him. But she was had been thick-skinned and not listened, as long as there was no girlfriend, she thought she could still wear him down. But she had been too shameless, and ended up being scolded by others. After a night of thinking, she decided to let her feelings for Huo Mu go.

When she got to school, she didn’t wait for Huo Mu at the gate, she didn’t say hello. She didn’t bring him breakfast. She went directly to her seat, and read her comics. All day, she didn’t pay any attention to him.

Huo Mu felt like something was wrong in his world. Though he looked quiet, he watched her from the corner of his eyes, not knowing what was wrong. It wasn’t her style to ignore him totally.

 

42 Winner Takes all: 

A habit was a terrible thing. He had gotten used to her bothersome presence.

Without her hovering about, he felt uncomfortable, like something was missing. She was always chattering, getting him water, sticking hear him. The silence now, was deafening.

Huo Mu had always been someone with good self-control because he was from a poor family. He knew he could only improve his life through hard work at school and in the future, so he took his classes very seriously. But this day, with Guanguan ignoring him, he could not listen to his teachers. His whole mind was on her.

Before, she would be watching him with an idiotic expression of intoxication. But today, there was nothing. She seemed to be listening to classes seriously – completely unlike her.

After school, Wen came to find Guanguan again. Their families were having dinner that evening, so they decided to go to the restaurant together.

As Guanguan packed up her things, a classmate asked, ‘Guanguan, is that your boyfriend? He’s been coming over every day, or is he chasing you as you chased Huo Mu? You should give him face, he’s so handsome as well.’

Guanguan hit her playfully, ‘What are you talking about? I’ve stopped chasing Huo Mu. Don’t talk nonsense about my friend. I’ve leaving. Bye!’

Guanguan’s voice was loud, Huo Mu and the rest of the class heard her. His expression darkened. The class mates milling about suddenly felt like the air went cold, with some of them even shivering. (Zuben: Chinese heroes have magic)

Huo Mu hurriedly packed up, his anger was obvious.

Just then Shu Lin came to him, ‘Huo Mu, I have movie tickets for that movie that just came out. My friend gave me because they didn’t have time to go. Would you like to go with me? I don’t have anyone else to go with.’

To Shu Lin, he was usually not too cold, just a bit offish. But this time, he looked angry.

‘I’m busy. I don’t have time to deal with you.’

He lifted his bag and left.

Shu Lin was speechless; was this the result when a girl was proactive?

🌕

Guanguan ignored him for a week, and Huo Mu didn’t feel right the whole time. He walked around soullessly, full of thoughts of her. But thinking she had a boyfriend; he didn’t dare talk to her.

On the Saturday, Guanguan went shopping by herself. She spent all day out and it was night before she decided to go home. She tried to catch a taxi, but another woman barrelled past her into the taxi, pushing her out of way causing Guanguan to twist her ankle and fall. (Zuben: *roll-eyes* these weak ankled girls.)

Pain shot up her leg as she fell. There seemed to be no one around to assist her. She suddenly felt miserable, and wanted to cry. But she felt it was a bit silly to cry over such a thing. But she could get up by herself, and she watched as her ankle got more swollen.

As she wondered what to do, someone held a hand out to her. She looked up to see Huo Mu. (Zuben: I’m sure she has a mobile to call her brother or sister in law)

She was surprised to see him, dressed in casual clothes.

He frowned as he pulled her up, ‘How did this happen?’ he asked.

‘I was about to get into a taxi, when this mean lady came and pushed me out of the way to get the taxi.’

He thought she had been reckless, but didn’t say anything. (Zuben: How was this her fault?)

She was a silly girl. He looked down at her swollen foot, she was unable to bear her weight on it.

He turned and bent down before her, ‘Get on, I’ll carry you home.’ (Zuben: Dude, are you just looking for skinship? You could just take her somewhere to find a taxi help her on and off it.)

Guanguan really wanted to get on, but she remembered he had Shu Lin. She didn’t want to cause any friction, so she refused.

‘No, if someone see us and tells Shu Lin, she will misunderstand. Why don’t you help me get a taxi instead?’

Huo Mu turned to her, staring at her silently for a while before speaking,

‘It would be hard to find a taxi in this area at this time of day. It would be a long wait.’

There was a pause, before he added, ‘Shu Lin is not my girlfriend. Who told you that? We’re just classmates.’

Guanguan wanted to reply but a realisation dawned; Shu Lin had lied.

She also liked Huo Mu and told lies to keep Guanguan away from him.

Free of restraint, she clambered onto his back. It was actually comfortable. His back was wide and warm, making her feel safe. (Zuben: How wide would a teenage boy who doesn’t play sports’ back be?) There was a faint scent of sea salt, probably his washing powder, but she liked it very much.

Guanguan smiled happily, now relieved he wasn’t dating Shu Lin.

‘So, you have been behaving weird because you thought I have a girlfriend?’

‘Yeah, I felt if you were dating Shu Lin, I would just be embarrassing myself disturbing you.’

She wrapped her arm around his shoulders to stabilise her as he walked.

‘But now I know you don’t have a girlfriend; can I still pursue you?’ she asked.

She was speaking over his shoulder, at his ear. Her warm breath stimulated his skin making his ears red. And he could feel her breasts pressed up against his back. The more he thought about the softness, he could feel his lower part hardening.

He got curious about the softness, and thought it would be great to touch.

Then he felt guilty, and decided he was to dastardly thinking of her breasts.

‘Hm.’ He replied.

Guanguan took it as a positive sign and was happy. If he didn’t agree, he would refuse outright. It was not a total rejection like before, so he must like her a little.

As they walked under the sodium glow of the street lamps, things looked soft.

Guanguan found herself wanting more staring at his profile. He looked so good, she wanted to kiss him.

She decided to try her luck,

‘Huo Mu, can I kiss you? Just a little kiss on your cheek. Can I? You’re so cute. I just want to.’

Huo Mu pause, and his fingers twitched. He was suddenly a little excited, his heart was beating fast. But with such an expressionless face, his excitement didn’t show.

‘Whatever.’ Was his reply.

Hearing his consent, she quickly gave him a peck on the cheek.

She didn’t see his face flush in the dark.

It had been years since that kiss, and when ever he thought of it, he still felt that the air that evening had been sweet.

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